The network effect. How people, not pitches, built my business

Coffee tastes better with company

After 20 years in the corporate world, I made a leap. I walked away from the structured certainty of titles, teams, and tightrope politics to back myself, trading in the comfort of a paycheck for the challenge of purpose, and despite the grey economic skies (not helped by the weather outside my window today!), I’m six months in, standing on the foundations of something new.

It’s no unicorn. It’s barely a Shetland pony. But it’s mine, and for the first time in a long time, I can say hand on heart that nearly 100% of what I do each day energises me. It’s inspiring, creative, and above all, mine to shape. That alone is worth more than any KPI dashboard I used to stare at or discuss new ideas with unmotivated 15-year veterans or professional meeting attendees (yes, you!).

Now, I’d love to say my early success is purely a result of my brilliance, hard-earned experience, or finely tuned strategic mind. And sure, that plays a part. But if I’m honest, the biggest reason I’ve found traction so quickly is something much simpler. Something easy to overlook, until it’s gone.

Conversations count

My work hasn’t come from ads or cold calls. It comes from conversations. From people I’ve worked with, laughed with, helped, and learned from. Associates. Mentors. Old colleagues who’ve become new friends. The kind of people who say “I know someone you should talk to” without hesitation.

In a country like New Zealand, where the business world is more village than metropolis, it’s not who you know, it’s how you stay connected. Because if you don’t know someone, chances are someone you know does. But they won’t think of you if they haven’t heard from you in years. And they won’t reach out if they’ve forgotten what makes you tick.

Networking isn’t schmoozing. It’s not about collecting LinkedIn badges or handing out cards like candy. It’s about relationships. It’s about taking a genuine interest in others, in where they are, where they’re going, and what they’re navigating. It’s about showing up before you need something. And sometimes, it’s just about being the one who remembers to say, “How are you doing?” Now, I’m not perfect by any stretch. I had a coffee with someone I respect highly, and love their passion and enthusiasm for their craft.  I hadn’t caught up in 8 months! But sometimes life will get in the way. However, I try, and that’s all you can do.

A few things that have worked for me.

Reach out before you need to

Don’t wait until you’re job-hunting or launching a new gig. Nurture your relationships while things are good. It’s far easier (and more authentic) to connect when there’s no ask attached.

Take the coffee (or beer/wine!)

Yes, your diary’s full. But if someone you respect asks to connect, make the time. Some of the best opportunities come from the least expected catch-ups.

Show interest, not just presence

Liking a LinkedIn post isn’t networking. Message them. Ask how a recent move is going. Congratulate them on a milestone. Let them know you're paying attention.

Add value without expecting anything

Share an article. Recommend a podcast. Make an introduction without expecting one back. The most powerful networks are built on generosity. Also, if someone reaches out and is looking for help, make the effort; you never know when this situation will be reversed.

Stay curious

Your network evolves as people do. Stay open to new industries, new people, and new ideas. Sometimes the best partnerships come from the most surprising places.

Life gets busy

I’ve met countless people over the years, smart, skilled, seasoned professionals who find themselves stuck, not because they lack ability, but because they let their network wither. And I get it. Life gets busy. Priorities shift. But I’ve also seen the opposite: those who simply keep showing up, stay curious, and offer a helping hand. And they’re the ones still moving forward when others stall.

One friend I’ve known for quite some time here in New Zealand is one of the best networkers I know, not because he is always on the hunt (he’s good at that as well) but because he is genuinely interested in people, the first to help or just be an ear when required! (You know who you are!)

There’s no magic in what I’ve done. Just a little courage, a few good people, and a garden that’s been quietly watered over the years. (Note – an article always needs one poor cliché!)

So this post isn’t just a reflection, it’s a thank you. To those who’ve had a coffee, shared a lead, asked a question, or offered encouragement. You know who you are. You’ve helped turn a spark into a start.

Darren Hopper - BabylonSixty.com